I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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