If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
