I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
