My balls are so social today.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
