Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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