My girlfriend figured out who you are.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
