If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
