passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
