i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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