Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize