PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
