very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I want to be your penis for a week.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
