Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
