Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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