Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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