hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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