she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
