Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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