dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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