Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
