So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
