Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
