He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just found puke in my bra..
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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