belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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