garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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