I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Randomize
