Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
