So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
