part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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