don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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