hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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