Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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