I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
