I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
