Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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