I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
