around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
