i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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