eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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