It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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