is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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