Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
