Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
