So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
