I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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