We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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