yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
