yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
