I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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