she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
So. Much. Porn.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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